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If all the testosterone-challenged ratbags who have ever slagged off my very good friend Kelli Salon

The Salone Ranger moves up a gear...
If all the testosterone-challenged ratbags who have ever slagged off my very good friend Kelli Salone would just eat their hearts out quietly we'll say no more about it. We've seen her looking good, but she's certainly getting the hang of this glamour thing now.

We don't expect her to be looking anything like as tasty when next we see her. That will be sometime in June when all the riders who are too crippled to ride the NPS series on the same day, congregate around crates of champagne in Chippenham, to watch her tear the head off some inoffensive young lady who doesn't know what she's let herself in for.

Kelli's got a thing about this combat fighting malarkey and is, by all accounts, extremely good at it. It's all Roman Empire gladiator stuff and takes place in a cage, which does not, apparently, stop the blood from spattering your perfectly starched evening shirt.

I do hope no one calls upon My Excellency to do the thumbs up/thumbs down thing. I never could tell which way is up.

To see more on this farrago keep buying the magazine. MBUK! What is it like?
This article was published by BikeRadar, the world's leading source of bike reviews, gear reviews, riding advice and route information
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